Some things in life don’t change no matter how hard and fast you try to run away from them. Memories just don’t go away , they stick within you . They choke you, they kill you, they tear you apart but they just don’t go away. The worst part is when you find yourself all alone in the jungle of memories trying to tackle emotions attached to memory one by one. All that you are left with thinking that moment is why is this being done to me? For what am I being subjected to this torture?
Your cries become a laughing stock of others. Your feelings don’t seem to carry any weight for the one you miss day and night. And when the loneliness makes you just sit down in your bed facing the dark sky and lonliness surrounding the room, you sit there numb, unshaken, untouched with only only one thing that shows some form of life...Tears and only tears!
They roll down your cheeks and the heart craves for some love. All that you are left with is to fight it out alone and wait for the night to pass with the hope of a happier morning. All why’s get hidden behind those memories becoz they are too close to your heart to be parted with.
Then you reach a point where to want to so badly hug someone and start a new life forgiving all that went wrong. You want sometin nice, sometin special to happen to you that very moment so badly, you search for him deep down memories within memories till you realise that it’s only you who cries every night, it’s only your who craves to be loved, it’s only you who wants a companion, it’s only you who is misses someone, it’s only you who in still so much in love with those memories.
And then you shrink with fear as you ask yourself why am I not missed as much as I miss someone? You keep asking becoz you are too shocked to believe that even love can do this bad to you. And you still spend every night choked with those memories and a disbelief that someone still doesn’t realise the intensity of your love with such horrific unbearable pain. And then you just ask one thing from God - Take me away!
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4 comments:
whoa!!! dat had so much intensity...blew me away!!!
so much pain in dat post...reflections of a painful memory...
all i can say is hang in thr...let d tears flow...dey help realease d venom...but they shud flow for u n not for anyone else...they shud define ur pain n not d pain caused...
tk cr...hugzzz
you just described everything i have been feeling for years now and i thought maybe if i act like everything is okay things would be different. i am seating in my little bed in Kuwait right now reading you article and i say thank you for writing this. i just wish i could stop feeling like this and try to make a happy life. start fresh and start strusting others again, just being loved and happy againg. thank you.
oh the post was very touching. it touch the cords of my heart... i do feel the same way... "GOD TAKE ME AWAY"... why is there no answer? why does this pain keep coming back? i want to put an end to this pain... tired tired tired of my life... god, please take me away
God needs no directions, nor he heeds to wrong requests. What i have felt is that you should try to come out of emotional coccon and face the realities and move on....The real way to live is Move on and introspect your feelings............ Hope u had a nice birthday...
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