God - Take me away

Some things in life don’t change no matter how hard and fast you try to run away from them. Memories just don’t go away , they stick within you . They choke you, they kill you, they tear you apart but they just don’t go away. The worst part is when you find yourself all alone in the jungle of memories trying to tackle emotions attached to memory one by one. All that you are left with thinking that moment is why is this being done to me? For what am I being subjected to this torture?
Your cries become a laughing stock of others. Your feelings don’t seem to carry any weight for the one you miss day and night. And when the loneliness makes you just sit down in your bed facing the dark sky and lonliness surrounding the room, you sit there numb, unshaken, untouched with only only one thing that shows some form of life...Tears and only tears!

They roll down your cheeks and the heart craves for some love. All that you are left with is to fight it out alone and wait for the night to pass with the hope of a happier morning. All why’s get hidden behind those memories becoz they are too close to your heart to be parted with.

Then you reach a point where to want to so badly hug someone and start a new life forgiving all that went wrong. You want sometin nice, sometin special to happen to you that very moment so badly, you search for him deep down memories within memories till you realise that it’s only you who cries every night, it’s only your who craves to be loved, it’s only you who wants a companion, it’s only you who is misses someone, it’s only you who in still so much in love with those memories.

And then you shrink with fear as you ask yourself why am I not missed as much as I miss someone? You keep asking becoz you are too shocked to believe that even love can do this bad to you. And you still spend every night choked with those memories and a disbelief that someone still doesn’t realise the intensity of your love with such horrific unbearable pain. And then you just ask one thing from God - Take me away!

Sometimes Say what you want to say

There is nothing constant in this world, no emotion, no situation nothing at all, life has its own twists and turns, one should be ready to face the challenges, all that agreed. Though I am aware of the fact I still wonder why people change. Especially our dear ones. And I have to fight with them to make them understand me. They change especially when we need them the most, people you least expect it from, people who mean so much to you. Its very strange. All you want is the person to comprehend what you did, is that too much to ask for?

Sometimes, you need to and you should still say...somethings...Even if it freaks out the other person or scares them...even if you have to stand on your feet with your ego under the soles...even when your worst fears might come true...even at the possibility of completely being misunderstood, judged etc. etc....

But I think sometimes, its just all right to empty your heart instead of negotiating with your feelings and putting everything under the covers with tags of "okay", "fine","no issues" and theek theek hoga ...dont do it to make it exception....never mind.
Sometimes, just put a break to all the good thoughts or the right thoughts . Sometimes, say what you want to say!